Yeah, sure—who wants problems? You can have them all—no problem! That’s what I used to think a few years ago, too. But I’ve learned to deal with them differently—and that’s really changed my life. Your problems are part of your life’s journey.
Problems are challenges that need to be solved
Some problems are easy to solve—if you can even call them problems at all. Actually, they’re nothing more than challenges waiting for a solution. At some point, I started ignoring the most persistent ones and putting them off. My thinking was: They’ll just go away on their own. Well—unfortunately, no. Problems demand a solution.
Why “Taking Away” Isn’t the Same as “Helping”
Dealing with problems is actually quite simple: Find a solution. If you can’t find one on your own, ask someone. But under no circumstances should you let anyone take your problems away from you. It’s disrespectful to take someone’s problems away! That doesn’t actually solve them—it just puts them off for a while. And what gets put off will come back.
What does that mean when someone else has a problem? Don't take it away—instead, walk alongside them. Ask questions, offer suggestions, be there for them—but leave the solution to the person who has the problem.
Not every problem needs to be solved
Some problems simply can't be solved—for me, certain relationships and friendships fall into this category. The only thing to do is learn to deal with it, or do things differently next time. That, too, is a solution.
What happens if you just ignore problems
If problems are constantly pushed aside, they’ll find another way out—usually inward, as a nasty illness or injury. I see myself as an interpreter between the body and the person: Mental health issues manifest in the body—an ancient truth that has, unfortunately, been lost. Your body is constantly sending you signals—it’s worth taking a closer look.
What this means for you
The next time someone comes to you with a problem, ask yourself: Do I really want to help, or do I just want to quickly make the problem go away? And if you’re struggling with something yourself: Seek support when you need it—but keep the solution in your own hands. That’s exactly where real growth begins.
This post is inspired by a chapter from my book “Just Me! …Not Normal!”—the first volume of the ON TARGET book series.
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